I stopped my friend at work the other night and I asked her if I could trust her to keep a secret for me. She of course said yes, which I already knew.
Before I told her my secret I asked her a lot of questions about how long she felt that she would never feel that eating was normal again, and to even drink water was such a big ordeal...well, she assured me that it took a while for everything to come together for her and for her pouch to be able to handle bigger or more frequent bites.
I then told her that my secret was that if I have to live like this the rest of my life then I am so very sorry I had the surgery. I don't mean that I am upset that I can't eat as much and I have to watch. No, it is the fact that I can't take any bigger of a bite than a baby spoon and I can't take more than 10-12cc of fluid at any one time. That is just not natural for me. What will I do in the summer when I have been outside and I am dying of thirst? Take a sip?????? Bullshit....I am a guzzler and I am a scarfer of food.
I know this is the hardest thing I will have to conquer in this journey. Please share your successes with me...does it get better? Will I always and forever have to sip and have to wait 3 minutes in between unless I want my heart to feel like it is exploding?
I am happy that I am losing weight...my legs feel so much better already. I am not sorry that I can't over indulge. I am sad that I have to take so long to eat or drink. I will overcome this, I know I will, but it has just been very hard for me.
Thanks for reading.
Hey Judy! Oh goodness, this brings back memories of how I was feeling freshly post op. As I'm typing this I'm drinking 20 oz. of skim milk. I'm not gulping...only because air gets stuck in my stomach and esophagus and it makes me feel like I'm going to throw up .... BUT I'm sure not sipping! I can finish 20 oz. in less than 10 minutes. And don't get me wrong, I can gulp now I just don't like the way it makes me feel. It will get better as you get further out. I was drinking faster and more liquid at probably 2 months out. I'm now 5 months out and only get discomfort from the air bubbles. Oh and water doesn't seem to cause as many bubbles as milk so I can gulp a little better with it. Smile and know that this will soon pass. I had buyer's remorse too and it wasn't just the liquid and sipping thing. That's totally normal to feel that way. You will love your sleeve in a couple of months. Right now, you're still fresh out of surgery and your body is healing and has been under a lot of stress. Hang in there! Penny
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